18/06/2013

為錢結婚,會快樂嗎?

  • Mei Ling

    Mei Ling

    廖吳美玲Mei Ling,做為電視真人騷《盛女愛作戰》幕後顧問一夜爆紅,因其經驗豐富,點評中肯直接,且手握優質筍盤無數,被譽為鑽石媒人,備受好評。其創立的香港婚姻介紹所Hong Kong Matchmakers。

    Mei Ling曾於紐約婚姻介紹學院就讀,成為美、德註冊婚配師,創立香港婚姻介紹所,有別於其他婚介所,Mei Ling所設門檻很高,專為香港單身高學歷人士作婚姻配對,創辦16年,成功撮合的高層男女不下數百對。

    Mei Ling曾於世界頂級大企業任要職,包括貿發局法蘭克福貿易顧問等。曾獲歐盟市場開拓及業務發展比賽冠軍,成為首位女性及華人獲得此殊榮。亦曾創立自己的時裝生意,在高峰時賣盤。

    著有《How to Find A Husband》。 Man Manual, Navigating Relationships

    鑽石媒人Mei Ling

  我讀到一個笑話。

 

  話說有位靚女在網上登廣告,招一個億萬老公。有天她收到一個回覆:「我有錢,你有美貌,這個交易聽起來似乎很公平,但我的財富每年都會增長,而你卻一年比一年老。我是『增值』資產,你是『貶值』資產。如果你只有美貌,那你便是一個不良的長線投資,因為你會一路貶值,在20年後更不值甚麼錢。作為一個明智投資者,都會選擇拋棄這項投資。親愛的,所有的億萬富豪都不傻......」雖然這故事很殘酷,卻是真理。

 

  著名的釣金龜人辦有鄧文迪,嫁給比她大37歲的梅鐸;大衛‧芬尼斯為嫁給艾頓莊而中途「轉基」。已故名人Anna Nicole Smith ,24歲時嫁給87歲的石油大亨J. Howard Marshall。有人問,她們真的快樂嗎?如果在她們的世界中,物質享受就是一切的話,財富一定能令她們過得很快活。

 

  是不是擁有財富就等於快樂?通常不是。以色列王所羅門是史上最富有的富豪之一,他擁有智慧、財富,更不缺女人——700個妻子和300個情婦,但他兩度尋死。美國名媛 Barbara Hutton 和 Christina Onasis,就像寶詠琴和龔如心一樣,晚年都是孤苦伶仃。著名護髮品牌歐萊雅的繼承人Liliane Bettencourt,和她的獨女Françoise Bettencourt-Meyers鬧翻......美國著名超市沃爾瑪公司創辦人山姆‧沃爾頓,他的兩個兒子羅布和吉姆反目成仇。阿道夫‧達斯勒和魯道夫‧達斯勒這兩兄弟,20年沒有和對方講話,而他們分別成立著名運動品牌Adidas和Puma,雖然兩者都很成功,試想如兩兄弟肯化敵聯盟,前途必然更甚。不少書和電影都有記載Gucci家族爭奪股權,將家人變成敵人的故事。

 

  在我們的人生中,要經歷上學、考試、找份好工,然後努力工作求晉升,更有不少人要節衣縮食買車買樓。大家試想想,如果你是一個億萬富豪,沒有人可要求或強迫你上學上班,你想收購甚麼學校和企業都可以,從不用節衣縮食,更不用聽人說教,甚至準時起床!這樣你會快樂點嗎?可能不會,因為我們自己通過努力爭取回報,所獲得的滿足感是錢買不了的。揮霍的態度使任何東西都沒價值。不懂感恩滿足的心,會令人感到人生空虛乏味。

 

  住在公屋、村屋或離島的人,大多很有團結精神,他們會互相照應,反而住在豪宅的有錢人,大多不認識他們的鄰居。在香港經濟未起飛前,很多小朋友喜歡在行人道上你追我逐,嬉戲大笑一番,他們愛玩彈波子、踢毽、跳繩和跳飛機等等,而現今的小朋友只愛上網玩電動遊戲,不與人溝通,這樣快樂嗎?

 

  當然我們要滿足生活的基本條件,為自己和家人追求一定程度的優質生活。我想大家明白的是,生活中有很多比財富更重要的東西,不應盲目追求更好、更大、更快的物質享受。如果你認為找另一半時的基本條件,是對方擁有大量財富,請你三思。

 

  (按:中文內容乃翻譯及撮寫版本)

 

Marrying For Money

 

  I read a joke somewhere:

 

  A beautiful woman advertised online that she was looking for a multi billionaire  husband. One replied, “ I am rich, you are beautiful, the deal sounds fair. But my wealth is increasing annually while you are growing older every year, therefore I am an appreciation and you, a depreciation asset. If beauty is all you’ve got, it’s a bad long term investment because it depreciates continuously and ain’t worth much in 20 years’ time .The only wise decision for any buyer is to dump it. Honey, anybody who is a billionaire is not a fool……” Crass perhaps, truthful nonetheless.

 

  Outstanding stories about gold diggerism include Wendi Deng who married Rupert Murdoch, 37 years her senior… David Furnish who was said to have turned gay in order to marry Elton John… The 24 year old Anna Nicole Smith who married the 87 year old oil tycoon J. Howard Marshall, with a staggering 63 year age difference. The question is, are they happy? Well, if material possessions mean everything to them, then having all that money would certainly make them deliriously happy.

 

  Does mega wealth really equate happiness? More often than not, the opposite is true. King Solomon was one of the richest men in history, he had wisdom, wealth and women, 700 wives and 300 concubines to be exact... Yet he attempted suicide twice. Both Barbara Hutton and Christina Onasis were sorrowfully forlorn, as were Po Wing Kam and Nina Wang towards the end of their days. Liliane Schueller, heiress to the L'Oréal empire became estranged from her only child, Françoise Bettencourt-Meyers... Rob and Jim Walton, sons of Sam, founder of Walmart, engrossed in bitter fights ... Brothers Adi and Rudolf Dassler didn’t speak to each other for 20 years, they formed Adidas and Puma separately, both successful, but  imagine if they had joined force? Books and films have been written and produced about the colossal Gucci feud where money turned the entire family into arch enemies…

 

  We have to get up, go to school, pass exams, get good jobs, then work very hard in order to advance our careers. We need to save up to buy a car or an apartment…Now imagine being a billionaire, neither required to go to school nor work, you can buy the school, the company, anything you want or don’t want…Never having to save…never having to be civilized to anybody, in fact you don’t even have to get out of bed ! Would you be happier? Probably not, there is this tremendous sense of satisfaction in earning something after a struggle which mega wealth does not offer. Squandering renders a prize without value. This lack of gratification or purpose eventually creates a void, a sense of emptiness.

 

  People living in government housing, villages or off shore islands have a much stronger sense of community, they look out for each other…people in luxurious high rises don’t know their neighbors. In Hong Kong’s poorer days, children were seen playing and giggling on the pavements, shooting marbles, playing hacky sack, rope jumping, hopscotch, mini rice bags…today we are so affluent our kids play video games or surf the web alone, not speaking to anybody. Are we happier?

 

  Of course the fundamentals in life have to be right and we all aspire to achieve a certain level of comfort for ourselves and our families. The ultimate wisdom is to realize that there are more important values in life than relentlessly pushing for better, bigger, faster, more. If you choose wealth as the primary criteria in finding a spouse, it may be worth your while to think again.

 

 

 《經濟通》所刊的署名及/或不署名文章,相關內容屬作者個人意見,並不代表《經濟通》立場,《經濟通》所扮演的角色是提供一個自由言論平台。

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  • jutice發表於 2013-6-24 10:34 AM
  • #11
  • 如果對方有錢又有心,仲要考慮?
    有錢不是萬能,但無錢想結婚亦談何容易。
    無錢的男士一樣可以不忠,這世代能夠天長地久,是運氣,但非必然。
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  • 李仔發表於 2013-6-22 12:46 PM
  • #9
  • 女人嫁個有錢ge,貪離婚果筆...眼光放遠D, 世上ge女強人都係為有錢女人服務,而有錢女人可能係女強人手下日日用黎鬧下,出下氣ge人罷了..你睇甘比? 一個職員仔,如果唔係泊好碼頭?佢俾老總捽緊啦..依家? 做訪問可能佢老總要低聲下氣求佢呀.. 現實就係咁.. 城中女富豪..有邊個唔係嫁D錢返黎? 白XX第一桶金係點黎..
    仲有,唔好以為只係益左自己..黃家產業依家一個唔覺意,轉左俾龔家..都係靠婚姻ja ..我識唔少..男家個仔死左,成份身家過左俾女家,男家父母跪低去求都冇用呀..
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  • Grace123發表於 2013-6-19 09:21 PM
  • #8
  • Even if you think it is happiness, it will only be temporary. When you get old, you will get dumped.
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  • 熟男發表於 2013-6-19 04:18 PM
  • #7
  • 魚與熊掌不可兼得!女人需要一個好愛她的男人照顧她,但她未必需要好愛個男人,只耍可以接受就得了。相反就很難看,像某生連濕吻相都呈堂,唉!
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  • Sunnyhh發表於 2013-6-19 03:53 PM
  • #6
  • 錢從來都可以買到快樂, 買唔到係因為未試過貧賤夫妻百事哀、窮在鄰家無人問之慘.
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  • bcg1001發表於 2013-6-19 01:14 AM
  • #5
  • 有錢唔會保証你快樂, 錢係一個工具, 可以用呢個工具去換取各種物質同服務, 快樂與否好在乎你嘅性格同生活態度, 錢亦唔會令到你唔快樂, 但係要保住或者増加你擁有嘅錢係一個好復雜的事, 過程中常會遇到好多問題同壓力。要識得減壓, 平衡工作同生活, 做多D善事, 關心家人, 同埋識得去運用你嘅錢。 願大家都開心快樂。
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  • FionaTang發表於 2013-6-18 11:00 PM
  • #4
  • 錢從來買不到快樂!
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  • Who_am_I發表於 2013-6-18 10:59 PM
  • #3
  • 純為錢去結婚,當然會很痛苦--一生對着不愛的人,但同時可以有感情基礎,相信會得到很多人的祝福;同樣地,年齡差距很大並不代表女人純為錢去結婚;理想對象應是有事業基礎,不需要太富有(一入豪門深似海啊!),女士們,對吧?
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  • Grace123發表於 2013-6-18 10:54 AM
  • #2
  • 出賣自己的愛情,怎會真正快樂?一個連自己的婚姻也會為錢而出賣的人,是一個絕對的失敗者。
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