17/12/2013
論「年齡」
Mei Ling
Mei Ling
廖吳美玲Mei Ling,做為電視真人騷《盛女愛作戰》幕後顧問一夜爆紅,因其經驗豐富,點評中肯直接,且手握優質筍盤無數,被譽為鑽石媒人,備受好評。其創立的香港婚姻介紹所Hong Kong Matchmakers。
Mei Ling曾於紐約婚姻介紹學院就讀,成為美、德註冊婚配師,創立香港婚姻介紹所,有別於其他婚介所,Mei Ling所設門檻很高,專為香港單身高學歷人士作婚姻配對,創辦16年,成功撮合的高層男女不下數百對。
Mei Ling曾於世界頂級大企業任要職,包括貿發局法蘭克福貿易顧問等。曾獲歐盟市場開拓及業務發展比賽冠軍,成為首位女性及華人獲得此殊榮。亦曾創立自己的時裝生意,在高峰時賣盤。
著有《How to Find A Husband》。 Man Manual, Navigating Relationships鑽石媒人Mei Ling
對大部分男人而言,36歲或以上的女人已錯過了最佳懷孕期,等同食品過了嚐味期限。這解釋了為何男人深知熟女更為優秀,適合自己,但仍會選擇較年輕的為妻。查理斯王子正是人辦。迎娶戴安娜,只因她的年青貌美符合他及家族的形象。花了若干年的時間,查理斯才發覺真正深愛的是年紀較大、較不起眼的卡米拉。
當然,凡事有兩面,女人對於男人的年齡亦異常敏感。較自己大十年的男人已是「太老」。她們對年紀較大的男人避之則吉,只因害怕很快要擔起照顧老伴的責任。因此,未婚的女人花掉大部分及僅餘的青春等待一個年輕男人,但這個男人又正尋找較年輕的伴侶。惡性循環,於香港,缺乏伴侶的問題較男女比例失衡更嚴重。若兩性能各退一步,著眼伴侶的整個人,而非單看年齡,相信距離出現更多美滿的婚姻的日子不遠。
事實上,在務農為生的時期,農夫們在日曬雨淋的工作環境下容易衰老。時至今日,在家或辦公室內冷氣機、抽濕機、暖爐俱備,加上飲食及運動的自覺,外出必備太陽眼鏡及防曬用品下,歲月被冰鮮,六十歲的貌似四十出頭。
最新的科學研究顯示年過四十的女性的卵巢幹細胞仍然能生產卵子。此研究推翻女性一生只能生產400顆卵子及於四十歲時卵子會壞掉的傳聞。年過四十的女性確實能繼續生產卵子,撫育孩兒。現今的世代抗衰老治療、再生醫學、生物同質性荷爾蒙補充療法 (BHRT)等資訊泛濫,其他數以百萬計的新產品也為身體保持狀態候命。
相反,誰能保證較年輕的妻子會較丈夫長命?這是在任何人、任何年齡層均可能發生的事。你能肯定自己活多久嗎?不能,但至今你仍願意大灑青春,等待一個可能到來或永遠不出現的年輕男伴。固執地拒絕約會較年長的男人,死守那條自訂的年齡界線,堅持等待那個符合理想年齡的年輕男伴,多傻!
今天,我們的法律打擊種族、性別、宗教歧視,同性戀者亦享有婚姻的權利,有人找代母產子,醫生以電話的應用程式代替藥方監察身體狀況,跨國組織尋求「思想領導接洽」,為下一代計劃將來,企業社會責任成為時尚文化……為何在同一個地球上,條件出色的香港單身一族仍執著於年齡數字,錯過非常優秀,有發展機會的終生伴侶?
如果你還是以數字尋人的單身一族,該好好想想。
(按:中文內容乃翻譯及撮寫版本)
This “Age” Thing
Men generally believe that women of 36 years and older have a “best by date” that is on the verge of expiry because their child-bearing years are “over”. This explains why they will implacably plod on to marry a younger woman knowing full well that older women might well be more compatible. Prince Charles is a case in point. He picked Diana because her age and appearance suited the image of the wife he – and his family – thought he should have. It took him years to realize that the much older, less attractive Camilla was a far better choice.
On the flip side of the coin, women are equally hypersensitive to the nu¬merical age of men. Most consider men ten years their senior way “too old”. They are reluctant to marry such men for fear of becoming widows or caregivers too soon. Hence, the unmarried woman can spend a greater part of her youth, or what’s left of it, waiting for the younger man who is waiting for the much younger woman. It becomes a vicious circle, and hence the shortage of partners becomes more acute than the gender imbalance in Hong Kong warrants! If indeed both sexes would only step back a pace and accept partners for the people they are, instead of how old they are, many more happy marriages would take place a lot sooner.
The truth is, in the days when people were farmers slogging in the fields rain or shine, they aged quickly. Today we work in offices and live in homes equipped with air conditioners, dehumidifiers and heaters, we exercise and eat conscientiously, we use sun block and skin care products, and we age considerably slower. The sixties are now the new forties.
The latest scientific research has found stem cells in ovaries of women over 40 years of age generating new eggs. This is busting the old myth that a woman is born with all her 400 eggs and they rot at 40. In fact, older women do produce new eggs, and can continue to bear children after that age. Indeed, today’s world is inundated with information regarding anti- ageing remedies, regenerative medicine, bio - identical hormone replacements…and millions of other new products to keep our bodies going.
Conversely, who is to say that a younger wife always outlives her husband? It can happen to anyone, at any age. Do you know for sure how long you will live? You don’t and yet you are willing to grow old waiting for that younger man who may or may not come along. To adamantly refuse to date the “older men” beyond your self-imposed “age limit” and insist on waiting for that younger man whose age doesn’t exceed that specific number you have in mind is truly, obtuse.
Today where there are laws against racial discrimination, sexual discrimination, religious discrimination…where homosexuals can legally get married, where one could rent-a-womb to have babies, where doctors may prescribe mobile apps to monitor one’s health instead of medicine to cure an illness… where multi-national corporations seek “Thought Leadership Engagements” to plan for generations ahead, where CSR (Corporate social responsibilities) is fast becoming a fashionable culture…Why on earth are seemingly intelligent singles all over Hong Kong still shunning perfectly good candidates for potential life partners just because of a higher number ??
If you are still single and looking, think about that.
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