具操縱動機的性行為
　　
　　葉卡捷琳娜二世（Catherine II）是一個淫亂的女色情狂，她幾乎與大部分的貴族、司令、將官等都有過性關係。而當她的丈夫彼得三世（Peter III）被刺殺後，兒子帕維爾‧彼得羅維奇（Alexei）隨即繼任皇位，她感到既委屈又憤怒，密謀罷免兒子篡奪王位。由於內閣成員多是她的情夫，她贏得絕對的支持。帕維爾被推翻後，葉卡捷琳娜就成為俄羅斯歷史上在位最長久的女皇。這是個女性如何利用性作武器來獲得財富和權力、征服和統治別人的露骨例子。

　　如今以性交流來換取名利者，雖然未必有葉卡捷琳娜二世般的大規模，但依然大有人在。這個「遊戲」也非女性的專利，現今有很多男士也會為富裕而寂寞的女士提供性服務，因而獲取可觀的報酬。在此我們將排除具操縱動機或具商業意味的性事，只集中於普通市民對性的態度。

　　
極端開放的性態度

 　　今天，香港人對性的態度就像鐘擺般，有些急過激開放，有些人卻過度保守。那怎樣才算是太多或過少的性生活呢？

　　其實很難訂出一個特定標準，計算怎樣的性生活才算是「正常」。一個有性障礙的男士，可能為了隱瞞自己性行為表現欠佳而指責另一半性慾太強，亦有些女士因不滿另一半的性表現而覺得嫌惡，因而指責他的正常需求為性慾太強。事實上社會對性的確有雙重標準，有多個性伴侶的男士會被人稱為「風流漢子」，而有多個性伴侶的女士則被稱為「淫賤蕩婦」。
　　

  　　醫學臨床實驗指出，一個人有過強性慾或過度性需求者就是「性上癮」，是一種病態。患者會對性貪得無厭，怎至到影響日常生活。「性上癮」的人只是為滿足性需要，不會有情感上的親密感，所以患者就算有頻密的性高潮也好，性交都不會令他們感到滿足。如真是受這類病徵折磨的人，應該盡快尋求醫生的協助。

　　比較普遍的「極端開放者」卻非病態者而是年青人，他們明目張膽地淫亂起來，很多更不分青紅皂白地與不同的人進行性行為。他們錯誤地認為大膽出位「無所謂」的性態度就是「開明」的表示，這樣才是「潮人」的風格。事實上，除了性病、意外懷孕、身心所帶來的創傷等的風險外，還有很多潛在的問題他們尚未了解到，只是他們以為自己甚麼都知，對這些問題滿不在乎。舉舉例子，慣性滿不在乎輕率的性交，對婚姻責任培育錯誤的觀念，令其將來容易出軌，難以對配偶忠誠，為將來離婚埋下伏線。頻密或未經妥善處理的墮胎，將來可能難以生育。更有些因為自己性濫交行為而失去自尊，日後患上抑鬱症或引起其他精神問題。

　　今天的社會，集體記憶力極強。良好的供獻未必會萬世流芳，但是不雅的事宜遺臭萬年的機會卻日漸龐大。屢次三番，更會在你最不為意時，捲土從來，摧毀你的一切。例如許仕仁被廉署起訴一案，是發生在7、8年前的事。岩士唐（Lance Armstrong）被剝奪7個環法自行車賽頭銜，是追究於在11年前的事。麥齊光被涉嫌房屋津貼一案，令他失去發展局局長一職，是有關25年前的事。日本內閣田中慶秋呈辭醜聞，是因他30年前所做的事……雖然性濫交不是犯法，更不會被起訴，但誰知道某天，你和你所愛的人不會被社會審判呢？

　　試想一天你老公最劇烈的競爭對手到處誇耀揚言對於你床上工夫有深入的了解？又或許你聰明的乖仔在競選公職時，你以往拍下類似陳冠希的淫照在網上「洗版」，將會為你家人帶來甚麼影響？曾幾何時「萊溫斯基」醫生的美譽，受到美國社會廣泛的尊重。自夢妮卡與前總統克林頓傳出性醜聞後，很多美國人都將「萊溫斯基」這個名字，用作「口交」綽號的婉言。

　　沒人會知道將來的事，但我們知道對性的態度極端開放，就是等於道德淪亡，而代價之高超乎你所想。（待續）

 

　　（按：中文內容乃翻譯及撮寫版本）

 

Sexual Attitude (1)

 

Manipulative Sex

 

　　Catherine II was a promiscuous nymphomaniac who slept with almost every nobleman, every admiral and general in court. Following the assassination of her husband Peter III, her son Alexei ascended to the throne, much to her ire and chagrin.  She wanted to depose him, and since most cabinet members were her lovers, she won overwhelming support. Alexei was overthrown and Empress Catherine the Great became the longest ruling female monarch of Russia. This is perhaps the most blatant example of how a woman had used sex as a weapon to attain wealth & power, to conquer and to rule.

 

　　Of course there are still people today who use sex to obtain fame and fortune, albeit not in the same scale as Catherine ’s . Nor is this game a monopoly for women, as many men do fare rather well by offering sexual favours to wealthy, lonely women. Here, we shall exclude both manipulative and commercial sex and concentrate solely on the attitudes of everyday people.

 

The Ultra Liberal

 

　　By and large, the sexual attitudes of today’s Hong Kong swing from one side of the pendulum to the other, from the ultra liberal to the ultra conservative. So how much sex is too much? and how much sex is not enough?

 

　　It is difficult to quantify the exact amount of sex as the “standard norm”. Men with sexual dysfunction might accuse their partners of being oversexed in order to hide their own sense of inadequacy, just as some women who wince at their partner's frequent sexual advances might accuse him of being oversexed. The difference is the double standard in our society which congratulates a highly sexed man with multiple partners, calling him a “stud” and condemning a woman who behaves likewise, calling her a “slut”.

 

　　The clinical conditions whereby someone has exceptionally high levels of sexual desire and/or activity are called sexual addiction or compulsivity. Such hyper-sexuality is a disorder, where sexual activity is an insatiable need, often interfering with other areas of everyday life; sex is impersonal, with no emotional intimacy; and despite frequent orgasms, sexual intercourse is generally not satisfying. The truly afflicted should seek medical help.

 

　　More common would be young people who are overtly promiscuous, indiscriminately engaging in random copulations with numerous partners. They mistakenly believe that being ultra liberal is being desirable, a “cool” new age attitude. The truth is, apart from the obvious risks of sexually transmitted diseases, unplanned pregnancies, physical & emotional turmoil…problems they shrug off because they think they know it all… there are loads of latent problems they do not as yet begin to comprehend…

 

　　For instance, habitual nonchalant sex nurtures wrong attitudes towards marital responsibility, making it easy to stray and difficult to stay faithful in wedlock –preprogramming failed marriages for the future. Frequent or improper abortions often make it difficult to conceive later in life. Debilitation of self esteem is the culprit of depression & other psychiatric problems.

 

　　Above all, past indiscretions cast long shadows and have a habit of re-visiting your future, destroying whatever matters, when you least expect it. For instance, the indictment of Hui Si Yan was based on wrongdoings dating back 7-8 years ago. Armstrong’s loss of 7 Tour titles was based on indiscretions committed 11 years ago… Mak Chai Kwong’s was 25 years ago… and Japanese Minister Keishu Tanaka’s was 30 years ago… Indiscriminate sex is neither a criminal nor a civil offence, you will not be indicted, but who is to say society will not one day, judge you or your loved ones ?

 

　　Imagine your husband’s competitors all boasting to have had carnal knowledge of you ? Or “Edison Chen” type of images being circulated when your son is running for public office? The name “Lewinsky” once commanded enormous respect as Dr Bernard Lewinsky’s reputation so deserved… After Monica’s scandal, “Lewinsky” became the nickname for “oral sex”…

 

　　We don’t know what the future holds for you, but we know “ultra liberal” sexual attitudes equate moral bankruptcy, the costs are higher than you think.

 

 

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