10/07/2012

約會禮儀你要知！(1)

　　基本上「禮儀」的定義就是適用於某一個場合、某一個時候的行為準則。懂得表達禮貌，總是百利而無一害的；所以無論男女客戶，我們都會鼓勵他們與異性約會時守禮。以下是幾點基本禮儀的守則：

1. 請勿遲到

　　「遲到」給人的印象是你不夠專業、不可靠或做事不認真。其實準時赴會並不是難事。舉個例子，如果你約了國家主席胡錦濤吃晚飯，你肯定不會遲到。由此可見準時和遲到其實都是你的選擇，如果你立心準時赴會的話，你一定做得到。你選擇遲到，是因為在你心目中，對方不是那麼重要，又或許認為自己高人一等，讓他等等好了。換著你是對方，如別人這樣對你，你又有何感受呢？

　　遲5分鐘內都是情有可原，但遲到多過5分鐘其實已不可接受。若你真是有原因逼不得已要遲到，請先告知對方，跟對方道歉，然後保證以後不會再遲到，這才算是尊重對方。但如果你推說工作太忙而要遲到便不是合理的原因，不要忘記全世界不只是你要工作的！

2. 穿著得宜

　　我們一般都會穿著整齊的衣服以表達尊重，例如去見工、到法庭、或跟重要的人物會面等。當我們穿得太隨便，表達的訊息就是不大關心。更要重視的是穿得隨便和衣衫襤褸很多時只是一線之差。有些玩rock的歌手可能覺得穿得破破爛爛很有型，但你又不是Rock star。此外，油頭垢面、黑邊指甲、口氣體臭等，在任何時候都會令人厭惡的。如果你趕頭趕命赴會而弄至滿身大汗、腋下和手汗淋漓的話，都是很趕客的行為。

　　與異性約會時並非叫你一定要穿得完美無瑕，只是要求穿著乾淨整齊，給對方一點基本的尊重而已。如果你想別人尊重你，首先你要尊重自己與別人。

3. 付款有道

　　禮上往來總比AA制顯得高雅，與異性約會時的潛規則很簡單，假設男方比女方的薪酬勁多，潛規則是3:1，即男方支付相關消費約3次而女方則應該回請1次；若大家的收入差不多，可按2：1回請；若女方經濟比男方强，那就各付1次好了。今天社會每事的透明度都很高，職位與收入約數的推測應不太困難。

　　無論由誰出錢也好，對方都應該立即表示謝意。若男方拒絕讓女方回請並不一定表示他是大方「豪」男；接受女方請客的男人亦未必表示他是cheap精。「回敬」只是一點心意，除了吃飯之外，女方可以其他途徑表示謝意，如請男方看演唱會/電影、或在晚飯後請他一同去做腳底按摩、或送些他喜歡的小禮物，如他喜歡的書、高爾夫球或唱片都可以，最重要是能表示你對他的一點心意。千萬不要以為自己高高在上，對方要「追你」便有職責請你去吃喝玩樂，絕非理所當然！

4. 別與手機談戀愛

　　很多餐廳和會所都有禁止客人講電話和響電話鈴聲的規則，可惜大部分都難以禁止客人的手機震動，所以未能有效杜絕以下的無禮行為。

　　很多人在約會期間不斷用手機覆信息，閱讀或傳送電郵，無論你對高科技暸如指掌也好，請勿在對方面前表演你用「WhatsAPP」的神乎奇技。在約會時不停玩手機是極度無禮貌的行為，無人有興趣知道你有多忙和有多投入工作，相反對方只會覺得你無教養和不尊重他/她。在任何的社交場合，都應該把手機放在一邊，與異性約會尤甚，請切記！

　　（按：中文內容乃翻譯及撮寫版本）

Dating Etiquette (1)

　　“Etiquette” basically means the code of behavior applicable to a given set of circumstances. As there are no down sides to good manners, we strongly urge our clients, both men and women, to abide by the same dating protocol. Here are some basic rules of dating decorum we recommend:

(1) Don’t Be Late

　　Being late conveys the impression that you are unprofessional, unreliable and cannot be taken seriously. If President Hu Jintao would invite you to dinner, you will most certainly not be late. What it means is that you can be on time if you want to, you are only late because you choose to be. You subconsciously believe yourself to be superior, and that the person you keep waiting isn’t important enough. You would not like it though if the other party would do the same to you.

　　In brief, 5 minutes here and there is acceptable, more than that it is not. If you truly have a valid reason, (being busy at work is NOT a valid reason – you are NOT the only person who works !) please inform the other person ahead of time; apologize sincerely, and don’t do it again in future.

(2) Dress Properly

　　We dress up to show respect to the people we meet, such as attending a job interview, appearing in court, meeting someone important. The opposite says exactly the opposite. There is a fine line
between looking casual and looking shabby. Some rock stars may find it “cool” to look dilapidated, but you are no rock star. Dirty hair and nails, bad breath, body odor are repugnant at all times. Coming straight from a brisk walk dripping in perspiration with wet arm pits and sticky hands is equally off putting. You don’t have to dress to perfection, just decent . Respect cannot be given, it has to be earned. If you want people to respect you, start by showing some first, both to others as well as to yourself.

(3) Who Pays ?

　　Reciprocation would be more elegant than going dutch. The unspoken rule is usually 3:1 if he earns much more, 2:1 if both earns about the same, and 1:1 if she earns more than he does. Most income levels, at least ball park figures, are common knowledge. If you really have no clue, take a wild guess. Whoever pays, the other should send a “thank you” note immediately afterwards. Refusing her reciprocation does not necessarily make him a catch, nor does accepting make him a cheapskate. As an alternative, the lady may also buy the concert/movie tickets, book through club memberships… arrange a foot massage for two after dinner.. or simply bring him a small gift… a book, a few golf balls, a CD he likes… as a simple gesture of appreciation. Just don’t sit back , take people for granted and expect to be continuously wined, dined and entertained.

(4) Get Off That Phone !

　　Many restaurants & private clubs forbid the ringing and talking on cell phones – and rightly so. Unfortunately, they cannot stop cell phones from vibrating. We all know you are a hot shot and tech savvy, so there really is no need to prove just how versatile you are with Whatsapp… It is exceedingly rude to be playing with your phone during a date, nobody will be impressed by your busy schedules or heavy commitments, more likely, he/she will think how rude and badly brought up you are. It is elementary social skill that you please put away that phone during any social engagement with anybody, very especially during a date !